Movie Review, Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Every word of what you just said was wrong. 

The Rebellion is reborn today. 

The war is just beginning. 

And I will not be the last Jedi.

First off, let me just say that I won't be seeing 3D movies anymore. They make the movie too dark, and it can be hard to see at times. I tried to see the movie a few days ago, but I was so tired that I actually fell asleep in the theater. Not because the movie was boring, but I had been up for 24 hours straight at that point. I saw it again tonight, and I liked it. So, let's get on with the review, shall we?

Possible Spoilers

Right off the bat, let me put your mind at ease. This movie is NOT a recreation of any of the previous movies, like Episode 7 turned out to be. That being said, there are several nods to Empire and Return of the Jedi. And while one of them seems to be a recreation of the Hoth escape scene in Empire, let me ask you this...How else would you portray a situation where the resistance is camped out on a planet, and the First Order shows up, and they need to escape? There's not much more you can do with that scene, although what happened after they escaped reminded me more of Battlestar Galactica than any previous Star Wars movie. 

I have seen mixed reactions to this movie. I really don't understand how any Star Wars fan could dislike this movie. It was much better than The Force Awakens,  and is easily better than the prequels. Possibly better than ROTJ and even the original movie. I'm not ready to go there yet. It has a solid story, that isn't ruined by lazy plot devices like a map. You can easily follow this story, and everything that happens does so for a reason. However, there were things that didn't sit well with me. Not anything to do with the story as a whole, but more because this movie is over 2.5 hours long. The scenes on the island with Rey and Luke were a little long, and there is a scene where Finn and a new character go searching for a code breaker. That scene didn't need to be there in my opinion. But, it was still an entertaining sequence. It kind of reminded me of an Indiana Jones movie. 

This scene was fun, but unnecessary

The movie was basically the story of Rey's relationship with Luke, as well as Kylo Ren and Snoke's attempt to turn her to the dark side. She is brought before Snoke, and the conclusion of that scene is a real surprise. It leaves you wondering exactly will happen next, and the movie makes you wait. The movie also continues building Rey into a powerful Jedi as she sharpens her skills and power. So, its mainly about Rey, yet the other story there is the desperate last gasp of the Resistance, as they stare annihilation in the face.

At the end of The Last Jedi, I really came away liking Kylo Ren a lot more both as a character and a villain. He seems less spoiled brat, and is really growing as a dark side force user. I'm anxious to see where his character goes in the next movie. He appears to have an ability to contact Rey, and project himself to places that are light years away. This is a skill that shows up later in the movie as well, but it turns out that it isn't exactly as it seems. Kylo seems to be much better written here than in the previous movie.

We also get to see Leia in a much more important role here. There is a scene where Leia comes into contact with Kylo Ren, and he has a chance to kill her. I won't say if he does or not. My only gripe here is that we finally find out that she has force abilities. I just wish they had done it differently, because the way they did it is a little on the impossible side, even in the Star Wars universe. Still, it was nice to see her using the force. 

Poe Dameron, and Finn both have prominent roles in the story, and they really grow as characters. The showdown that we saw in the trailer between Finn and Phasma was very good, although I doubt we'll see Phasma in the next movie, which is unfortunate. Phasma is very well represented in that she towers over the rest of the stormtroopers. If you haven't read the book about her, you really need to. Its very good. You also see just how brutal the stormtroopers under Phasma really are. Poe really steps up as a leader, and Finn becomes much more dedicated to the cause.

Overall, as I said earlier, I was very happy with this movie. I think most Star Wars fans will be too. A couple random tidbits, we find out where blue milk comes from. Those little owl looking creatures are there briefly for comic relief, but they don't go overboard with them. Leia hugs Chewie. And, the new land walkers seriously dwarf the ones that we saw in Empire. We do learn Rey's origins, but we do not learn Snoke's. However, in retrospect, this is a good thing. If it was revealed to Rey, she would have no idea who he was referring to, and the scene likely would have been cut anyway. Maybe it was. Who knows. 

These new walkers are close to double the size
of the ones we saw in Empire.

I honestly don't get where all the negative reviews on this movie come from. Detractors were complaining about the lack of originality in The Force Awakens, and this movie is a fresh and original story. I never read reviews until after I've written mine, but I really do think this is one of the better Star Wars films. When I first saw The Force Awakens, I had to overlook the fact that it was basically a remake of the original film in order to give it a positive review. But, the more I watched it, the less I liked it. I deleted my positive review, and wrote this. I don't see myself doing this with episode 8. So, go see it! You won't be disappointed!

Headscratcher Moments In Star Wars: The Force Awakens

"Let's blow it up!"

Better late than never, I guess. I was talking with a friend, and I was saying how while I like The Force Awakens, there were a few things in the movie that really rub me the wrong way. I love all things Star Wars. I've seen all the movies in their original theatrical releases, and I've seen every episode of BOTH Clone Wars TV shows, as well as Star Wars: Rebels. Now that my nerd credentials are out of the way, lets begin. (My friends inspire lots of blog posts, don't they?)

Obviously, my main issue is the fact that Luke Skywalker had just a minute of screen time, and no lines. I had gotten my hopes up about seeing him in the film. But, that's everyone's main gripe about it. My others are a little more subtle. 

Mark Hamill: The highest paid extra
in the history of the world

For the rest of them, we'll start from the beginning. I've never liked the idea of a missing piece of a map. Its too cliche. It almost seems lazy. Especially, when the piece that Poe recovered was the surrounding area that had the missing piece section it. The Empire found the Rebel Base in The Empire Strikes Back using thousands of probe droids. The First Order could have easily done the same thing to find Luke. Just send a ship to the edge where the map ends, and dispatch the droids! Not to mention the question of why was there even a map in the first place??

Ok, so I had that backwards.
Still, the missing piece has Luke's exact location!
But, I hate maps in movies!

Next up are several scenes from Finn. I'm not going into how he knew how to bring down Starkiller Base after being a janitor. Although, they could have made him something more believable. No, there are a couple scenes that were poorly written. I don't blame this on the actor at all. And, both scenes are at the Maz's Bar scene. First, when the Resistance comes in, and starts blasting every Storm Trooper around, Finn stops to look up, and admire the pilot's handy work. And, he happily stands up, and says "That's one hell of a pilot!" Now, I know people who have been in combat, and when air support arrived, and started mowing down the enemy, they ran for cover. They didn't stop to admire the pilot's skill. I know, I've asked them. 

The next scene from Finn comes shortly after Rey is taken by Kylo Ren. He's depressed, and tells Maz that he doesn't have a weapon. She tells him that he does, and refers to Luke's lightsaber, which he has no idea how to use. Meanwhile, there are dead storm troopers all over the place, with their weapons in their hands, or next to them. 

How in the hell do I use this damn thing?

Next, we're going to talk about the Millennium Falcon. No, I'm not going to talk about how Rey just mysteriously knew how to fly the ship as well as Han Solo. I have an answer for that. The Force Awaken(ed) in her. That's how. My problem is when they discover that Starkiller Base has a shield that can withstand anything traveling under light speed. So, they penetrate the shield at light speed, then throw on the brakes? Not likely. How long would it take to throw on the brakes? Much longer than the amount of time they would have had to stop the ship. They would have made a crater on the planet that would have literally destroyed the planet. That's what they should have done. Had a ship travel at light speed on remote control. Nobody onboard. Aim it directly at the weapon. Don't even bother slowing down. The planet and the weapon are history. And, Han Solo would still be with us, as well as all the Resistance fighters who died in the assault. But, Kylo Ren and General Hux also would have been killed. Without them, we don't have Episode 8.

Unless its a different movie.

This is a more accurate description of
coming out of light speed than
what was depicted in The Force Awakens.
How LUDICROUS! 

So, these are just a few. There are a few more, but I can't think of them right off the bat. Once again, I love all things Star Wars. But, I've seen The Force Awakens about 5 times. I've seen Rogue One twice, and I'm afraid to watch it again because I don't want to start ripping it apart. That being said, I'm very excited about the upcoming movies. I have high hopes that the next movies will all be better than The Force Awakens. Most of the gripes that people have about this movie could have been avoided if they had just taken a little more time on the script!!!

So, until my next post, live long and prosper. May the force be with you! 

Ironic Tie of Fisher/Reynolds Deaths to Star Wars Movies

RIP, Carrie Fisher and

Debbie Reynolds

I'm not sure if anyone has noticed this yet, but I did, and as far as I know, I'm the first to come up with it. If someone else did before today, no plagiarism was intended. Anyway, I'm a little emotional as I write about this striking example of life mimicking art. 

This will be a short post, and here we go. What happened with Fisher and Reynolds, who if you don't know were mother and daughter. They had a very close relationship. When Carrie died, the very next day, Reynolds died after suffering a stroke. One of the last things Reynolds said was "I want to be with Carrie." And, its been said through the media that she died of a broken heart.

Now, in Star Wars: Episode 3, at the end, when Padme was giving birth to Luke and Leia, she died shortly after childbirth. The droid doctor said (paraphrasing) "I cannot explain it. She has lost the will to live.She died of a broken heart" 

Reynolds was Carrie's mother. She died the day after her daughter (Leia) died. Leia's mother (Padme) died giving birth to Leia. BOTH died of a broken heart. I know the conditions are different, but the similarity is ironic, especially when Episode 3 came out more than a decade ago. And, when you look at it that way, Carrie/Leia lost 2 mothers, one fictional, one real to a broken heart. 

That blew me away when I made that connection. Yeah, I am a sci fi nerd. I've admitted it many times on this blog. I avoid spoilers to movies like the plague, but I did see something suggesting that all of Carrie Fisher's scenes in Episode 8 have already been filmed. I hope this is true.

I also hope that Leia gets to
take out a bunch of stormtroopers
in Episode 8.

Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds were loved, and will continue to be loved. Carrie is now one with the force, and will be with us always as we rewatch these beloved movies for years to come. Once again, RIP, and Fuck You, 2016!

Movie Review: Rogue One

The question is...

Is the best Star Wars film 

of all time??

Holy crap, people! Rogue One is incredible. Its better than the prequels, the original trilogy, and it blows The Force Awakens out of the water. Is it better than The Empire Strikes Back? I haven't decided yet, but I am leaning that way. Truth be told, it is amazing, and you need to see it in the theater. Now, that's done, let's get down to the review. Ready? Here we go!!


                                         Warning: Spoilers!


The movie starts slow. For about 20-25 minutes, its giving a back story, which is necessary because the film is introducing you to characters that you've never seen before. But the remaining 90+ minutes is nothing but gripping action.


There is no text crawl at the beginning of the movie, and I was ok with that for a couple reasons. One, it is a Star Wars story, not an actual Star Wars movie. Two, you already know what was going on, especially if you've been watching Star Wars: Rebels, and The Clone Wars. The word gets out that the Empire is building a doomsday weapon, and they have to find a way to stop it.


Rogue One answers several questions that Star Wars fans have had for years. One, How did the design flaw in the Death Star get there? Two, Does the Death Star have a hyper drive? And, Three, Can Darth Vader fight as well in the suit? Well, the design flaw was put there by a scientist, Galen Erso who was forced to work on the project. He put it there as revenge on the Empire for forcing him to work on the weapon, which does have a hyper drive. And, yes Vader can fight in the suit. He is absolutely brutal. So brutal and deadly that it is now obvious that he was just toying with Obi Wan in Episode 4, and with Luke in Empire. Not so much in Return of the Jedi though.


Years after Erso was kidnapped, his daughter, Jyn Erso is liberated from an Imperial work camp by Cassian Andor, a rebel captain, and taken to Saw Gerrera, a rebel that even the rebellion doesn't like because of his crazy ways. You may remember him from The Clone Wars.

Jyn Erso in the final battle

He has a message for Jyn from her father. The message states that he did in fact put the design flaw in the Death Star plans, but before he could explain exactly how to exploit it, the Empire arrives with the Death Star, and obliterates the city. Gerrera stays and meets his fate, but the others are able to escape to Yavin 4, where the rebel base is. The rebels actually decide to surrender because of the power of the weapon, but Jyn, Andor, and a group of rebels, including an Imperial pilot who has defected take a captured freighter to go and infiltrate an imperial base to steal the Death Star Plans. When they arrive at the base, and are able to get in, the rest of the rebellion shows up and the fight begins. The rebels ultimately get the plans, and a familiar ship blasts its way out of the system in the nick of time.


Right off the bat, the Death Star in Rogue One is down right terrifying. You get a chill the first time you see it with its weapon being installed. And, its appearance at the end of the movie is spine tingling as well. 

That's no moon!

This movie is extremely well done. The characters are brilliantly developed, and you actually care about them, especially knowing they are on a suicide mission. The story is riveting, and you're on the edge of your seat the whole time. There is some comic relief, that comes from a droid, K-2SO, an imperial droid that has been reprogrammed to serve the Rebellion. His lines are pure sarcasm, yet genuinely funny. It isn't forced, annoying, and childish like another character who shall remain nameless. There is nothing for kids in this movie. 

K-2SO..Possibly my new favorite talking droid

The CGI is damn near perfection. In fact, there are 2 characters from Episode 4 that are in the film, and they are completely 100% CGI, and you'd never be able to tell the difference. The landscapes are spectacular, and everything looks dirty and gritty, as it did in Episode 4. The point of view is incredible as well. You see the AT-AT walkers as if you're on the ground, looking up at them. The battle scenes? Spectacular. The space battle scenes are not only the best in Star Wars, but likely the best in all of Sci-fi. And, the point of view from the Death Star? We see the blasts from the planet instead of space.


It also follows the theory that the Empire was using the Death Star in secret. After the first city was destroyed, they made mention that the propaganda story was that the city was destroyed as a result of a mining accident. Although, it won't be secret much longer!


Since the Jedi are gone, we also see a force user who isn't a Jedi, but he uses the force in other ways. He's blind, but can see. He's also a master at martial arts. There are so many great characters in this movie. 

Not a Jedi but can wield the Force as well as any

There are also plenty of Easter eggs in Rogue One, but they aren't out in the open and obvious like they are in Episode 7. You see the 2 jerks who were giving Luke a hard time in the Cantina. You see the Hoth monster, and come to the conclusion that the one on Hoth must be a hermit that chooses to live in seclusion. There are others, but they are used sparingly. Even Darth Vader is used sparingly. Everything is done just right.


Speaking of Vader, I have to tell you about Vader's fight scene. At the end, his star destroyer captures a Rebel cruiser. A captain gives an order to form a boarding party. We see the rebels from their side of the door, and as it is broken down, we do NOT see a bunch of storm troopers. We see Darth Vader in the doorway, and nobody else. He then activates his light saber and mows down about 20 rebel soldiers like they were nothing. Intense!

The movie ends literally where if it kept going, the very next scene would be the opening scene from Episode 4. This is the best movie I've seen in a very long time. Is it the best Star Wars movie? I don't know if its better than The Empire Strikes Back, but it is definitely better than Episodes 1,2,3,4,6, and 7. It blows Episode 7 out of the water.


So, Gareth Edwards, you hit a grand slam! Thank you! You owe it to yourself to go see this movie. And, if this is what we can expect from Disney owning Star Wars, and from Episodes 8,9 and the upcoming spinoff movies, then SIGN ME UP!

Star Wars: Who's Fault Is It?

Everything bad that happened can be

blamed on ONE specific character.

Prepare your jaw to drop!

Its true. Everything bad can be blamed on one specific character. The Empire, the Emperor, Darth Vader, the Death Star, all the misery, and even up to events that take place in the new films. I'm not talking about George Lucas, or anybody like that. Just characters in the story. One specific character can be blamed for EVERYTHING bad that happens. NO SKIPPING TO THE BOTTOM! Just read the whole post. This one isn't very long.

You could easily say that everything was Palpatine's fault. And sure, he is an evil SOB who pulled the strings like puppets and such but he was enabled. He had help. Had it not been for this one character, he would not have been able to achieve his plans.

Anakin Skywalker/ Darth Vader: Nope. Not him either. Sure, his turning to the Dark Side helped The Emperor achieve his plans, but had this one character not been there, it likely would not have happened.

Count Dooku: Not the Count either. He was the first Jedi to turn, but he was too old by the time The Emperor was able to put his plans into action. Dooku was eliminated.

You'll never guess. But, it will all be clear soon. Let's look at a couple more suspects shall we?

Qui Gon Ginn: You could argue that Qui Gon's insisting that Anakin be trained led to everything crashing down. The things that happened to Anakin are a result of this one character doing his or her dirty deeds.

So, who is this mysterious super villain? You probably can't think of someone so evil that he brings down the whole galaxy, can you? Well, this character isn't evil. 

Scroll down for the revelation:

Keep scrolling...

And the character that every single bad thing in the Galaxy far far away can be blamed on is.....

None other than: Jar Jar Binks.

Whaaa? Mesa causing everything???

That's right. The clumsy, super annoying Gungan who would never hurt a fly yet everybody hated is personally responsible for the death and destruction. All of it. Every single bit. And this isn't one of those Jar Jar Sith Lord theories. What you are about to read is FACT, and actually happens in the movie.

How? Well, I'll tell you. Its simple really. In Episode 2, Senator Amidala went into hiding. As she did, she left that idiot in charge, thinking he wouldn't do anything serious. She probably thought that even if he did try to do something, nobody would take him seriously. Well, she was wrong. He went before the senate, and raised the notion of giving absolute power to Chancellor Palpatine. Had he not done that, and kept his mouth shut, Palpatine would not have received the power, and thus wouldn't have been able to become the Emperor. Sure, if not for Jar Jar, he would have found another way, and if that had happened, we would be talking about a different stooge, but lucky for us, Jar Jar did it, and we get to bash him.

So, hating Jar Jar is justified. His blunder resulted in FAR more death, destruction and misery than Neville Chamberlin's blunder prior to World War II. It caused planets to be destroyed. It caused a prosperous republic to become poor with all the wealth given to or stolen by the ruling class.

Now, pick your jaw up off the floor, and share this post. Your friends need to know that Jar Jar is responsible for everything bad n Star Wars. Have a nice day!