5 Gift Ideas for someone you hate...Like a mother in law

That pic is really hilarious. And, true in so many of our cases. Why do these people think they need to go out of their way to make your lives miserable? In many cases, you do something nice for the person, and you wind up being treated like a scumbag for it. 

 

 

Case and point, my mother in law guilted my wife into moving close to her so she could see her grand daughter. I had a good job at the time, but after this move, I couldn't find another one, and we had to stay with this troll for a few months. She went out of her way to make everyone involved completely miserable...even the grand daughter. Since we left her place, I haven't seen or talked to her in almost a year and a half, and she can't understand why. She thinks she is a perfect little angel, and that I am the one with the problem. Who cares? I sure don't. I'm fine as long as I don't have to see her.

Now, Mother's Day, her birthday, and Christmas come around every year. Lucky for me, my wife doesn't insist that I get the troll anything. But, some of you aren't that lucky. Some of you have to give gifts to someone who instead of seeing them, you would rather french kiss a starving wolverine with bad breath. So, I came up with a list of 5 things to get for someone you hate, whether its a mother in law, sibling, aunt/uncle, or whoever. A list of 5 seemingly innocent and thoughtful things that can have hidden meanings. A way of expressing your feelings toward that person without your spouse or that hated person having any idea that your gift means "Go jump off a cliff into a pool filled with sharks, piranhas, and lamprey eels."

Keep in mind, these are 'keep the peace' gifts that will satisfy your spouse because you actually got something for the inlaw. These gifts will make the inlaw happy, but give you inner satisfaction.

Gift number 5: A Snuggie. She will like this, but we all know how stupid looking those things are.
 



Or maybe one for her cat?



Gift number 4: If she has a dog or cat, get her a big bag of dog or cat food. That way, you aren't getting HER anything, and she won't know the difference.

Gift number 3: The $5 to $10 movie collections you see in grocery stores. You know, the ones with 8 bad movies you've never even heard of?

 

Make SURE you get the
horror collection!

Gift number 2: A kid's crossword puzzle or word search book. "Oops, I didn't realize this was a children's puzzle book. It was with the others and I was in a hurry. I'm sorry!" But what you are saying is that you think a children's book is all she is smart enough to figure out. So, you have to apologize, but the apology masks your true intention. 

Gift number 1, (my personal favorite) A bag of almonds. Yes, a simple bag of almonds.Why almonds? Did you know that almonds have trace amounts of cyanide in them? Need I say more?

 

 

 

All of these suggestions are great subtle ways to make yourself feel better about getting a gift for someone you hate. Got another one? List it! 

1983-1988...Heavy Metal's Golden Age

I do not hide the fact that I am a fan of the 1980's heavy metal music. The music that came out during that time frame inspired me in my own music, and I judge all other metal against that era. Sadly, pretty much all of it comes up lacking.

Friends always joke with me, and tell me that I am stuck in the 80's. I tell them they are damn right, and I am proud of it. Sometimes, I will ask friends to name one album that is better than what came out during the Golden Age of metal. They will try, but are unsuccessful.

Let's take a moment and look at the masterpieces that came out during that time frame. Here are some of them off the top of my head...I'm sure I've left some off the list, but you get the point with this list:

Between 1983 and 1988, 

Iron Maiden released 3 of their greatest albums: Powerslave, Somewhere in Time, and Seventh Son of a Seventh Son. While they put out great albums before and after the Golden Age, not one album lives up to these three.

Judas Priest  released Defenders of the Faith, Turbo, and Ram It Down. Screaming For Vengeance was released in 1982. Priest is probably not the best example for this considering the latter two albums were not very well received, but you can't have a list like this without Priest. Plus, they more than redeemed themselves in 1990 with the masterpiece, Painkiller.

Stryper released Soldiers Under Command and To Hell With The Devil. Both are masterpieces. Their next release, In God We Trust was a major letdown, and the band never recovered. Although, their followup to In God We Trust which was Against The Law in 1990 was not well received, the music and songs were very good. Had this been the follow up to To Hell With The Devil, I think Stryper would have been Bon Jovi huge.

Queensryche released Rage for Order, and the iconic masterpiece, Operation: Mindcrime. The followup release in 1990, Empire was very good, but a letdown after Mindcrime, and Promised Land was a gem. The band went downhill fast after that.

Metallica released Ride the Lightning and the iconic Master of Puppets. In 1988, they released ...And Justice For All which was a good album, but nowhere near as good as the prior two. And Metallica has not come close to matching those two albums since.

Anthrax released Among The Living and State of Euphoria. By far, their two best albums.

Dokken released 3 great albums in that time frame: Tooth and Nail, Under Lock and Key, and Back for the Attack. Since then, the band has had a revolving door of musicians whose efforts will never live up to their best 3 albums.

Megadeth released Peace Sells, But Who's Buying and So Far, So Good, So What. These 2 albums were groundbreaking, however Megadeth released their crowning jewel, Rust in Peace in 1990.

RATT released their 4 best efforts, Out of the Cellar, Invasion of Your Privacy, Dancing Undercover, and Reach For the Sky during that time frame. Nothing special since then.

Slayer released their juggernaut, Reign in Blood.

Ozzy, released Bark at the Moon, Ultimate Sin, and No Rest For The Wicked. I know his first 2 albums were also masterpieces, but with these three, he was trying to adjust to losing Randy Rhoads. Not an easy feat to accomplish, but he did it, and the albums were great. No Rest for the Wicked was Ozzy's last great album.

Honorable mention to Crimson Glory, who's Transcendence album, released in 1988 is an iconic album for progressive metal. With better management, they would have been HUGE.

So, tell me why I should modernize? I say if it ain't broke, don't fix it. These BANDS can't even top their own albums written in the Golden Age, so how could some crap corporate rock band like Nickelback even hope to come close? Not to mention, these new metal bands, and even some of the bands I listed just simply write forgettable music these days, and in the days following the Golden Age.

There are several newer bands that are very good, and I do get into such as Disturbed. But, if Iron Maiden and Disturbed are playing concerts the same night, and I can only go to one, guess which one I'm going to see. If you said Iron Maiden, then you would be right.

So, if you still insist on telling me that I am stuck in the 80's, and should modernize, here is your mission if you choose to accept it: Find me a band that compares musically, lyrically, and with overall talent to the pioneers of Heavy Metal's Golden Age. If you can, I will listen, and if I think it compares, I will be honest.

However, don't hold your breath. It hasn't happened yet, and I doubt it ever will.

Could heavy metal have a second Golden Age? I hope so, and all we can do is wait and see. But in the meantime, grab Master of Puppets, throw it in the CD player, turn it up to 11, Rock the horns, and Bang Your Head because the Golden Age of heavy metal will never die!

Movie Review: Star Trek Into Darkness

The first of JJ Abrams' Star Trek reboots came out in 2009, and we were told that because of the time change, everything that their lives could have become would be different or something to that effect. That gave the Abrams team a clean slate to do whatever they wanted to do with it. Some Trek fans are angry because Mr. Spock is very un Spock-like. Well, I think if I watched my planet get destroyed, I would be a very different person as well, especially since Spock is half human. Something traumatic happens, the emotional human side takes over. Same thing with Kirk, and having to grow up without a father. Its understandable.

I'm bringing this up because in 'Into Darkness,' the Spock character evolves even more toward the human side. Zachary Quinto owns the role in this movie. He was very believable, even without having to suspend dis belief. 

Karl Urban stole the show as McCoy in the first one. perfected it in this one. Chris Pine's portrayal of Kirk was about the same as in the first film, as were Zoe Saldana as Uhura, Anton Yelchin as Chekov, and Jon Cho as Sulu. Pretty good, but nothing spectacular, unlike Urban.

However, there was one character who shined in his role, and in my opinion is now right up there with Karl Urban. Simon Pegg hit the ball out of the park as Scotty in this movie.

Now, we come to the controversial character. Benedict Cumberbatch as villain, John Harrison, AKA You Know Who...I'll be discussing the plot later because I don't want to spoil this for anyone. For now, we'll just stick to the review. Cumberbatch played Khan VERY well. He was a MUCH better villain than the Romulan, Nero in the first film. He was brutal, and extremely intelligent. I guess casting a man who played Sherlock Holmes to play Khan was a great idea.

Peter Weller also plays a significant role in this movie. He plays Admiral Alexander Marcus, who also happens to be the father of Carol Marcus, played by Alice Eve. Speaking of Carol Marcus, the quick shot in the Into Darkness trailer of her in her undies is not what you think, and I will leave it at that.

The action is riveting, and the story is solid. Through the majority of the film, you don't know what is going to happen next, so it is not just a remake or even a re-imagining of Star Trek 2. However at the end, it gets a little predictable, and there are a couple scenes where you just want to smack Abrams upside the head, and ask "WHY?" But, even with the couple scenes that they could have/ should have done differently, it is still a good movie. Better than the first one, and better than ANY of the Next Generation films, although Star Trek 2 and Star Trek 6 are still the reigning champions as the best Star Trek movies.

If you're worried that this movie will spoil Star Trek 2 and TOS Space Seed episode, don't be. It is Star Trek, in its alternate universe, like was explained in the first film, as well as in this blog. The movie even explains how the clash with Khan is happening now as opposed to later as in ST2. Not literally, but it is explained, and when I watched it, I thought to myself "Oh okay, that makes sense."

There were a couple scenes that made me wonder what they were thinking when they made it. Nothing major, just a minor writing flaw. I'm specifically talking about the hand held communicators. I was always under the impression that they were for short range communications. Not in this movie, I guess.

The plot centers around the theory that power corrupts, and also deals with terrorism. Go see it. If you're an old school Trekkie, you'll enjoy it. If you are new to Trek, you might want to watch the Space Seed episode and Star Trek 2 before seeing it. The only reason I say that is because if you don't know the original story, you won't understand just how much of a bad guy Khan is, and you won't understand what is actually being said when a certain someone tells Spock about Khan.

I give it 3.5 of 5 stars. The only reason it isn't 4 out of 5 is because of those scenes toward the end that I mentioned. Still, I may go see it again.

***SPOILERS***

Basically, Khan and his crew were found by Admiral Marcus. It doesn't say it in the movie, but I'm assuming that Marcus found the Botany Bay. Marcus is a leader in the underground Section 31 organization who wants Starfleet to be militarized, and wants to start a war with the Klingons. Using Khan's superior intellect, he and Khan construct a massive ship called the USS Vengeance, that is faster and more powerful than anything else known to the fleet. Khan is given the identity of John Harrison, and a Starfleet rank, but he quickly becomes a threat to Marcus. Marcus wants him dead. 

Harrison then begins terrorist bombings, and Marcus decides after an attempt on his life that kills several officers, including Captain Pike to send Kirk and the Enterprise on a mission to eliminate Harrison. He equips the Enterprise with 72 long range photon torpedoes, and orders Kirk to find Harrison, and obliterate him, using the torpedoes. Scotty wants nothing to do with the torpedoes, and resigns. 

The Enterprise warps off to the Klingon home world, Kronos where Harrison is. Harrison figures no one would follow him there. Shortly before they get to Kronos, the Enterprise's warp drive malfunctions, and they drop out of warp in Klingon space, exposed. We later find out that the engines were sabotaged. Kirk detects Harrison, and they go by shuttlecraft to capture him, rather than just opening fire...disobeying Marcus's order. After a showdown with Klingons, and aided by Harrison himself, Harrison is captured, and reveals his true identity. He tells Kirk that Marcus is trying to start a war, which firing on Kronos would have done. He also tells Kirk to examine the torpedoes. Kirk contacts Scotty, and gives him coordinates to check out. Coordinates that Khan gave to Kirk. 

Inside each torpedo tube is a member of Khan's crew. If they had fired them, every one of the crew would have been killed, and no one would have known anything about them, which was what Marcus wanted. 

Kirk contacts Marcus, and tells him that they captured Harrison.

Scotty goes to the coordinates, near Jupiter and finds the spacedock for the mega warship, Vengeance. 

Marcus shows up with the Vengeance, and demands that Khan be handed over. Kirk refuses, and warps away. But, the Vengeance catches up easily, and opens fire on the Enterprise. They both come out of warp near Earth's moon. The Enterprise is severely damaged, and Marcus is about to destroy the Enterprise, but they suffer a power outage, and we learn that Scotty had sneaked aboard and sabotaged the Vengeance. 

Kirk goes with Khan to the Vengeance to arrest Marcus, leaving Spock in control of the Enterprise. Spock contacts Spock Prime, and asks about Khan. Spock Prime tells Spock that he cannot tell him anything other than the fact that Khan was a very dangerous, intelligent, and evil man.

Kirk, Scotty and Khan get to the bridge to arrest Marcus, but Khan kills Marcus, and betrays Kirk. He beats up Kirk and Scotty, and contacts Spock to negotiate the photon torpedoes carrying his crew. Spock agrees, and they are beamed over. Khan then beams Scotty and Kirk back to the Enterprise, and opens fire on the ship. What he doesn't know is that Spock had the crew removed from the torpedoes, and armed one of them. It explodes, and both crippled ships start drifting toward Earth. 

The Enterprise is dead, yet Kirk goes into a radiation flooded section to realign the warp core. Sound familiar? Its because it is. This scene is pretty much the exact same as ST2, except for who is on which side of the glass. Kirk gets the warp coil realigned, and the Enterprise flies back up into space just in the nick of time. Kirk dies, and as he dies, an emotional Spock tears up, gets angry, and yells...You guessed it. "KHAAAAANNNN!!!"

The Vengeance crashes into San Francisco, and Spock goes down to kill Khan. Earlier in the movie, McCoy had injected Khan's blood into a dead tribble, and it suddenly comes back to life. McCoy sends Uhura down to Earth to tell Spock that Khan must be taken alive. The fight is a stand off, until Uhura gets there and shoots him with a phaser. Spock then knocks him out. His blood is put into Kirk, and it brings him back to life. Khan and his crew are put into cold storage.

A year later, the Enterprise is repaired and ready to embark on the longest space mission to date. A 5 year mission to explore strange new worlds....

The Enterprise is rechristened, and Kirk gives the captain's creed speech, which talks about Starfleet's mission, and concludes with Space...The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise......

American Idol vs Paying Your Dues.

In this day and age of the internet, and instant gratification, we all expect the best of everything immediately. We want the best TV shows. We want the best music. We want the best sports team. We want the best blah blah blah.

But, what's being lost is the long and tedious road to becoming the best.

When I was a teenager, in 1990, I played guitar in a band. (I've been in a bunch of bands, but right now, we are talking about my first band.) A Christian band called 'Epidemic.' Strange name for a Christian band, but it worked for us. We were going to spread the Word of God like an epidemic. We all started out, only knowing a few chords, and we practiced in a garage 3 to 5 days a week. And, we were horrible. We played our first show, and we thought we were rock stars, but looking back, My GOD we sucked. There was a video tape of that show. I pray to God that it suffered the fate of so many other VHS tapes, and is sitting in a landfill, along with dirty diapers, beer cans, dead bodies, and 'New Kids on the Block' CDs.

But, we kept going. And little by little, we got better...and better. Our second, third, and fourth shows, we still sucked. But, by the tenth one, we were halfway decent...meaning that a good musician could sit through our set and see potential, rather than wanting to stab himself in both ears with a screwdriver.

In 1991, Epidemic played a 500 seat theater, and sold it out. It was a show that we put on ourselves. We rented out the venue, and promoted it. After we paid the venue, sound guy, etc, we broke even. And, we were pumped about doing that!

Epidemic lasted 2 years. After that show, we decided to go into clubs, and the band died about 6 months later, and was gone. Each member joined or formed other bands and the rest is history.

Now, fast forward to 2013. We are going to go back to my history soon, I promise.

With TV shows like American Idol, The Voice, etc, all of the buildup and appreciation is gone. Now, you have a kid who can sing like a gifted angel, but he/she wants to go on American Idol, and bypass the learning process. And, 9 times out of 10, we never hear from these kids again once some idiot on a panel of judges tells them to stuff it. 

Now, we are going back to my past. I was 19 or 20, and I was starting a band. We wanted to be a 5 piece with myself and another guitarist, along with a singer, bassist and drummer. We couldn't find a singer, so because of the fact that I had sang backup vocals in Epidemic, and in the band that I was in after that, I felt I had a pretty decent voice. The new band agreed, and we decided that I would sing. I struggled, and learned the words. It was hard to sing and play guitar at the same time, but I managed...in practice. 

The band got booked for our first show, and I was nervous. But, I wasn't worried, and neither were the other band members.

We should have been.

Because of the fact that I had been a guitar player/ backup singer for every single show I had played up to that point, I took the stage, thinking that I would be fine singing lead vocals. The first song had a dual guitar part which I nailed. But, when it came time for me to sing, I did nothing. I was playing the guitar part, and expecting to hear the lead vocals. But I didn't hear them! I actually remember thinking "SHIT! I've gotta sing!" I missed the first two lines of the song before coming in, and it went downhill from there. Worst show that I've ever done in my life. And to top it off, my mom and stepfather were at that show. My dad was there too, videotaping it. I KNOW that video tape is in a landfill. I put it there myself. But what made it worse was that my stepfather is an accomplished musician and singer. He told me "I could tell you were having a bad night." Which translated meant "YOU SUCKED!!!!" 

The band didn't suck. I sucked.

We are going to fast forward to 2013 again. What if American Idol or any of the other singing reality shows had existed back then? If I had been singing in front of Simon, and he told me that I sucked, what would I have done (in today's mindset?)

I would have sulked off and never done anything again, which is what most of these American Idol rejects do.

REWIND!

After the failure of my first attempt at being a lead singer, I was determined to get it right. That band broke up right after that show, but I started going to karaoke bars. At home, I started building my vocal range, and working with singing and playing guitar at the same time. I won several karaoke contests, singing high stuff like Queen, Styx, and Meatloaf. 

The next band I would be in of any relevance was several years later. I had not only learned how to be a singer, I had also learned how to sing heavy metal with a high voice, yet with an aggressiveness. While other singers of the period were screaming like they had a hammer shoved down their throats, I was singing. I started a band with a pair of guitarists from a recently disbanded local legend. I was the lead singer ONLY. This band quickly gained a following, but deep down, I wasn't happy just being the lead singer. I wanted to play guitar as well.

This band played several shows, but we had a problem with one of the guitarists. He didn't show up to practices and missed the learning of a new song. He assured us that he knew the song after one practice, right before a show the next night. 

He didn't. And what happened when we played the show was our own 'Spinal Tap' moment. During the song, he lost his place, and got lost in the song. He took off his guitar, threw it down, and walked off stage. We finished the show as a 4 piece, and we stayed a 4 piece, but I was finally what I wanted to be...A singer/guitarist. 

This lineup lasted about a year, but gathered one hell of a following. Sadly, internal problems caused its breakup.

I moved to Tennessee, where I put together a clone of the previous band. I also continued to work on my voice. The musicians were as good, except for the drummer, and we quickly gained a following. But, it also didn't last very long because I was insisting on it being a clone band. My bad, I admit. But, during that time, I recorded some original songs both with the band and on my own. This was around 2002, and my voice had never been better up to that point. But, I left Tennessee a year after that.

Fast forward: 2003

I was in a karaoke bar in South Carolina where I had moved to. I sang some 80's metal power ballads. The karaoke host was a local guitar hero. I knew who he was. After hearing me sing, he asked me to audition for his 80's metal tribute band. I did, and was chosen to be the singer. Once again, I was singing with no guitar. No problem. Our first show together was opening for Jani Lane of Warrant and Kevin DuBrow of Quiet Riot. I ruled that crowd. One of the songs we did was 'I Believe in a Thing Called Love' by The Darkness. That song had just came out at the time, and I nailed it. Little did I know at the time that Jani Lane was in the club, and heard me sing. I got to meet him after their set. He actually told me that it had been years since he heard a local guy scream like that. He also told me that he didn't have the balls to do 'I Believe in a Thing Called Love' and gave me major props.

I did one more show with that band, and quit. I wasn't  into doing covers, apparently.

Fast forward again to 2013. 

I settled down, and never played again (to date) and I've lost alot of my vocal range. But, I miss it. I have been going to karaoke bars again to try to get the range back. I want to be in a band again, but I won't do it until I can get back to singing strongly. Its a long process, but I have patience.

Do you think for one minute that any of these people on these singing shows would have the perseverance and drive to carry out what I did? Many other musicians have done the same. Being in music isn't about instant gratification. Its about hard and reward-less work until you deserve the reward.

These kids on these singing reality shows not only don't deserve the reward, they jumped past the process to earning the reward.

The reward is not the record deal. The reward is seeing your hard work pay off. These kids on the singing shows get to sing songs written by record company executives. They will never know how orgasmic it is to see and hear a crowd singing an original song that they wrote, after rising through the trenches and the ranks, fighting for and earning recognition.

Am I old school? Maybe, but I would much rather impose MY will and my music on people than for some corporate record executive to tell me to go away on national television. 

The day the music died was the day that people could audition to be the next American Idol. 

Growing as a musician is the only way to save music as it was when it was good, and not just a meat grinder of mindless corporate junk that all sounds the same. 

Stairway to Humdrum, Highway to...HEADACHES!!!

I get it, ok??? I get that Led Zeppelin is a founder of hard rock, and heavy metal. I really do. I understand. I know this to be true. I realize that Led Zeppelin is a LEGENDARY band. I understand that I am a moron if I do not worship at the altar in front of the 'Houses of the Holy.'

When is enough enough? In the town that I reluctantly live in and am stuck in, there is a rock station called 'BAD DOG.' They play a mix of 70's, 80's, 90's, 2000s, and current music. You would think that would be a good format right? Play enough variety of rock to please everybody, right?

You're wrong.

This radio station might as well be called 'BLACK DOG.' Every single hour, you will hear one Led Zeppelin song, one AC/DC song, one ZZ Top song, and one Aerosmith song, followed by the top latest hits from the current bands that you are also sick of. You can literally set your watch to Zed Zeppelin. They will also throw one of four Guns n Roses songs, one of four Judas Priest songs, and a Rush song. And the songs of course are all the songs by the various bands that you have been sick of since the late 80's because radio stations play NOTHING ELSE.

Instead of playing songs like 'A Touch of Evil' by Judas Priest, we get 'Breaking the Law, and Living After Midnight. Think they will even play something like Victim of Changes or Diamonds and Rust?

You've Got Another Think Coming.

Don't think I'm just bitching about the crappy rock station in the crappy town I live in. Radio stations like this exist all over the country. They do it because they think that all the classic rock they play will get them a larger audience. But what they don't realize is that there are also stations that play nothing but CLASSIC ROCK! But stations like Bad (Black) Dog play MORE Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, ZZ Top, Aerosmith, etc than even most CLASSIC ROCK STATIONS!!!

When was the last time you were listening to the radio and Stairway came on, and you just flipped out with excitement? Me personally, I have NEVER done that, and neither have you. I did like it back in the late 80's and early 90's when the rock stations didn't play Led Zeppelin during the day. At 9:00 PM, they would 'GET THE LED OUT!!!!' That was cool. It made you look forward to it if you wanted to hear it. But they don't do that anymore. They just play the entire Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, ZZ Top, etc catalog every single day of the week, over and over again.

STOP IT ALREADY!!! You want to play a variety? Here's a suggestion. Play other stuff. You think you are playing a variety, but all you are doing is playing EVERYTHING that has been worn out over the years. One DJ actually said "All right, rockers, we got a real treat coming up for you right after this break!" It was Free Bird. Really? That's a treat? It was more like being forced to eat your Brussels Sprouts as a kid.

Bottom line here is that if I want to hear Led Zep, ZZ Top, AC/DC, Pink Floyd, etc, I will listen to a classic rock station. But stations like this one have made sure that I will NEVER want to hear Led Zep, AC/DC, etc again as long as I live. If the radio stations  want to do something different, step outside of the box and ditch the songs that we all heard 10,000 times before hitting puberty. Dig a little deeper into the 80's rock/metal. Instead of playing Paradise City, Sweet Child of Mine, and Welcome to the Jungle, play Mr. Brownstone, Live and Let Die, or You Could be Mine. Use this template for your entire artist catalog.

Just in case you need any help, Ratt has more songs than Round and Round. Queensryche has more songs than Silent Lucidity and Jet City Woman. Deep Purple has more songs than Smoke on the Water.

I just can't believe that people stand for this crap.

Do I like Led Zep, AC/DC, ZZ Top, etc? YES! I DO! But that isn't the point. I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR SOMETHING DIFFERENT for a change!!! Literally, if I hear these same songs, I change the station. Translated, I listen to more talk radio these days than music. So called 'rock radio' is the number one recruitment tool for sports, and political talk radio. Why? Because program directors don't know how to listen to their fans. One person who calls the radio station and tells the DJ that the station rocks is all they need to hear. They are validated.

That is bullshit.

Am I the only one who feels this way? Come on. I know I'm not! I know you change the station too!

There's a lady who's sure

That her radio's broke

Because all that it plays is Led Zeppelin....